How to stop being afraid to fail

The Art of Gratitude

SCROLL DOWN ↓


On Thursday, we asked a question about FAILING.

And we found the answers people gave to be very interesting.

Now – if you’ll take a moment to read this – we’d like to give you our thoughts on why people are AFRAID TO FAIL.

Most of the answers that people gave were fairly predictable.

(Of course, we don’t mean that in a negative way whatsoever).

And in fairness, maybe they were predictable because the fear of failure is a basic reality that doesn’t actually have or require much depth.

The answers ranged from “not afraid of failing, just afraid of the judgements people will have if we do” to “once we start experiencing success, we no longer fear failing”.

But we want to add a different layer of consideration into the topic.

Specifically –

“Self vs Object Referral”

Self versus Object Reference matters a great deal in the art of success (no matter what goals you have or how you define success for yourself).

When you’re Object Referenced, you attach your success (and happiness) to the destinations and outcomes of your goal.

As an entrepreneur, when you finally start taking consistent action and see the fruits of your labor begin paying off in revenue, you feel happier.

More fulfilled and satisfied.

And you no longer worry about people’s judgements.

As a fitness participant, when you finally start taking consistent action and see the fruits of your labor begin paying off in weight lost, you feel happier.

More fulfilled and satisfied.

And you no longer worry about people’s judgements.

But what happens if a marketing platform that had been proving effective stops working?

What happens if you catch a cold, can’t train for a week and start gaining some pounds back?

Your happiness, fulfillment and satisfaction jumps straight off the ledge.

That’s what happens.

And you begin to stress.

Overthink.

Self-Doubt.

Procrastinate.

Resume that horrible, wicked and defeatist banter in your head all over again.

The voice that keeps reminding you that you aren’t good enough.

Smart enough.

Capable enough.

Worthy enough.

And that slide into the dark abyss resumes.

Putting you right back where you started.

Until you get that fire re-lit (typically from an external source) and start taking action again consistently.

That’s the roller coaster most people live for years.

Taking action consistently is an absolute must.

Aligning your thoughts and self-beliefs with your goals is undeniably required.

But the essence of SUSTAINABLE success (in anything) has more to do with self-mastery than most people know, realize or oftentimes believe.

Know yourself.

Eliminate your self-limiting beliefs.

Create an environment of Self Reference (in which your goal is the action of action, NOT the result).

And learning to detach from the destination and outcome is the first step in self-mastery.

Self-mastery (mindset) is so much more than just “how you think”.

It’s about understanding your unconscious drivers.

Those immaterial motivating forces that compel you to act in the material world.

So if you do feel as though you’re “afraid to fail”, consider where your attachments lie (self or object).

It will give you more clarity than you likely realize.

Thanks for taking the time to read…

… We hope this has given you some food for thought.


Brian & Carrie


Comments are closed